“Unworthy”

I recall years ago, before I went to TNU, being a major fan of Southern Gospel music. I knew all the groups, most of the top singers, and in high school and one year of college even sang in a group called The Eastmen Trio.

One group in particular that I loved a great deal was the Speer Family. Their enthusiasm and high level of sincerity appealed to me. In fact the trio did some of their songs. One of my favorite songs by the Speers was called “Unworthy.” It is a quiet song of testimony of how a beggar became a child of God, in spite of being unworthy of it all. It speaks clearly of grace and mercy.

The whole idea of unworthiness came roaring back again recently in church. Part of my duties is to select the Sunday morning hymns for the traditional service. Since Lent was upon us, the grand hymn “Beneath the Cross of Jesus” is an unspoken requirement to be sung at least once during Lent. The cross is the cornerstone of our faith, and this hymn magnificently portrays that.

Here is how the second verse in the Presbyterian hymnal goes:

Upon the cross of Jesus mine eyes at times can see
The very dying form of One who suffered there for me;
And from my smitten heart with tears two wonders I confess:
The wonder of redeeming love, and my unworthiness.

(words by Elizabeth Clephane, 1868; music by Frederick Maker, 1881)

I have to confess something now. Have you ever felt a sense of entitlement as far as asking God for something? I guess we use this occasionally as a kind of bargaining chip. “Ok, God, I do this, am faithful, etc, now you can do that for me.” Maybe we do not use those exact words but…well, you know.

I have been like that.

I also wonder about those times where we are told, “And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son.” (John 14:13) Yet, it seems like the heavens have closed an iron door and there is no one listening. It makes us somewhat angry; frustrated with God in that we are doing what he told us to do, yet getting absolutely nowhere, or so it seems.

This is where the idea of unworthiness comes in along with God’s plan we cannot yet understand.

The hymn puts forth a couple of things before getting to the unworthy part. There is the vision of the dying form of One who suffered for us. When we see that our hearts are broken, seemingly beyond repair, it stops us cold. The two wonders are redeeming love, where Christ delivered us from sin through the shedding of his blood for us. The last three words summarize the rest, “and my unworthiness.” It is by grace we have been saved, so said Paul. For God loved us so much that he gave his only son to die for us…so said Jesus to Nicodemus; in our place; instead of us. Someone had to be punished for sin to satisfy God’s holiness; we deserved it, but Jesus, in fulfilling the will of the Father, went in our place, sacrificing himself for all humanity.

My senses were awakened by the thought that there is nothing I do or am that will ever make me worthy of anything. I am not worthy of his love, but he loves me anyway. I am not worthy of the promise of eternal life, but it’s there anyway. I am not even worthy to ask him for anything, but he wants me to anyway.

At the end of the wonderful song by the Speers, the words become, “But he made me worthy, and now by his grace, his mercy has made me his own.” This changes the whole picture because it establishes me now as a child of God. Am I still unworthy? Yes, absolutely. I don’t deserve any of this. But, now I belong to him.

Maybe this is what he has been trying to get through my thick skull all along, and it is finally beginning to sink in.

He loves me anyway, and has made me his son. Wow, what a thought!

Thanks be to God.